A few days back I wrote in the comments:
Before this election season, I was in a psychological/spiritual space where those things didn’t affect me in the same way, and then I got sucked in again! Damn, damn, damn. Now I have to go back and do it all over again, just so I can function. Ultimately a good thing, however. I’ll be sure to report if I find a way out.
“Those things” being collectively the vicious madness all around us, of course. That’s one reason I haven’t been writing much here lately: I went too deep into the affairs of man and had my head rung like a bell. You could also call it “shocked into temporary submission,” which I’m sure affects a great many more of us. But this presidential campaign has hit me harder than any I can remember — while they must have been awful in the past, this year I’ve never been aware of so many failures of human virtue in public life. Our national dialogue, such as it is, contains so much ignorance, hatred, and brazen lies, I can hardly cruise the blogs for half a day without incurring serious damage. Maybe it’s always been that way at the core, but the Internet makes it easy to refine the evil brew and get a straight dose. (I go here sometimes, but please be careful: some of the links are very unhealthy.)
Truly, I can’t remember a time in my own life when we seemed to care so little for each other — and I came of age at a time when policemen were siccing snarling dogs on civil-rights marchers, forgodssakes. It simply boggles the mind. Hardly anyone in public life seems to have any self-awareness at all, either (except my man).
UGH. RETCH. GOO-GOO PUCKY.
Meanwhile, I’ve learned something morbidly fascinating as a result of watching a National Geographic documentary on PBS. This one was all about strange things happening on planet Earth, except every topic was ultimately reducible to “and then we ate it.” We did, people did. Humans did. Disappearing wildlife in Africa? Simple: THEY ATE THEM. (It’s called “bush meat.”) No fish in the sea? WE ATE THEM. And on and on and on.
Somewhere along the line we must have eaten our own souls. Today I visited a worthwhile site that shall remain nameless and read a breathlessly upbeat post about how New York City is getting rid of hundreds of old subway cars by dumping them in the ocean — and did you know, why, there’s nothing toxic about them at all (very different from any NYC subway cars I’ve ridden on), and just look how much the fishes love them, etc. etc. But every time I read about some godawful piece of wreckage being sunk to “provide fish habitat,” I want to scream. It may be quasi-ecological to a lunatic, but it’s certainly immoral: we should be taking things out of the ocean, not putting them in. If there wasn’t sufficient fish habitat before we dropped subway cars into the briny deep, it’s because one way or the other, we ate it!
When a mindless planet-eating disease decides to hold an election, what else does one expect, I guess? Right. And you know what? This is strangely comforting. Just more evidence that the whole thing is our own damned fault, which means if we succeed (i.e., fail), the Earth wins.
Yay, I think.
(This probably means everything is sort of all right, but check back with me later to make sure.)