Christmas 2008

A very different one it is, too, and better in many ways…

The most obvious visible change is right here at home: we have almost no decorations up or presents waiting to be opened. I did go mushing in the snow, crunching my way through frozen cactus and sagebrush, to retrieve greens, pine cones, juniper berries, and mistletoe to hang on the front door and make an arrangement for the bar. Yes, we have a bar in this weird old adobe hovel with the stopped-up septic tank, in the room we call the “saloon,” where the sofa and the woodstove live. It’s THE place to hang out in the winter, that one small room, and I also hung a string of colored lights from WalMart around the entrance. My sister-in-law’s family sent a passel of presents, and those are all I see for now, but I’m glad they’re there. I told my wife, “Your sister gave us Christmas,” which is absolutely true.

But don’t get the idea I’m complaining, or that this is something sad. Not for me, anyway, not in the least! Think simple and healthy, and the idea came from my Iowa girl, which makes it all the more astounding. Kind of like Nixon going to China, if you get my drift, only more compassionate and clean. What happened was, she found herself scheduled for a very demanding chamber music concert performance just after New Year’s, and something had to give. The only way she could physically and psychologically meet this extreme (but welcome) challenge was by total dedication: practice, rest, practice, rest, the practice again.

No time to drive to the storage unit and haul out the boxes of decorations. No time to hang them up all over the house and take them down again. No time to shop at all! Her baby grand showed up less than a week ago, an incredible gift for her, and she said she didn’t need any other presents, that we weren’t to buy each other anything this year at all. If my words are well-chosen, you’ll perceive that this comes from love, not self-denial, and that it’s backed by the full moral and spiritual integrity of her will. It also protects her, of course, and enables full access to inner resources demanded by the process. I’m in awe that she can do this.

I’m very much a part of the effort. I have to be. Consider the impact of the weather, for example. It’s always a lurching shock to find oneself adapting on the fly to impossible or merely ugly driving conditions:

“Oh shit, it’s going to snow again!”

“You don’t need bread. [tequila, brown sugar, oatmeal, butter, meat] We have plenty to eat in the cupboard!”

“I’d better go and come back while I can…”

“How am I going to go PRACTICE??!”

When she drives to her studio, I don’t have the car, obviously. And if our driveway is iced over and covered with snow, the truck had better be parked somewhere else. If it’s not, I can’t go anywhere, and even if it is, a 2WD pickup on a snow-packed road demands a vital mission. So this is my weather-related physical involvement, juggling, shifting, and occasionally chauffeurring. Overall, however, I doubt we can even call this the tip of the iceberg yet, but the singular focus on her performance makes it easy to prioritize.

If you didn’t get a card or present from me, you probably won’t this year. Christmas 2008 is dedicated to Bach, you might say, and to keeping everything as sane as possible, under the hammer of the cold. The solar New Year has already begun and I actually feel good, so hang in there, it could happen to you.

Best wishes to everyone love to family and friends.

(And now for some lunch…)

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